I had a dream that my writing time was uninterrupted. No family drama or emergency took me away from my words. I stayed on task. All the items on my checklist from blogs, to edits to marketing were completed. Then the alarm went off and I woke to reality. And I’m not alone in the real world of writing during crisis. Several writer friends requested prayer or shared their own struggles with meeting deadlines while family tragedies formed around them.
Some are dealing with aging parents and Alzheimer, illness, or tough things with their adult children. Others, it’s teens in rebellion, little ones with special needs, spouses in the hospital and the list goes on.
We will have trials
We don’t get to quit our day jobs to deal with most of this stuff, and our writing is just as important. But we can adjust. One author writes only hundreds of words daily rather than thousands as she waits by the bedside of her ailing mother.
Taking the laptop to the library to distance oneself from family drama for a few hours a day is one way we writers cope. Unfortunate circumstances beyond our control amplify the adage, “there is no perfect time to start writing.”
Jesus reminds us that in this world we will have trials. And as a Christian the second half of the verse rings true for me. He says, “I have overcome the world”. Praying and seeking His peace and clarity is so crucial during family drama.
Keep a journal
No, this is not the time to write about the trial. You’re too close and your emotions too raw. Keep a journal or open a file on your computer and dump all your emotions there. Someday in the distant future all that angst will be fodder for a novel, article, or how-to-endure-family-drama book.
Keep moving forward
For now, you just put one foot in front of the other. Decide what things you need to let go while you deal with the emotional, physical or legal things associated with your trial. I hired a lawyer to deal with all the paperwork for my aging parents. After my father passed, my mother is happy in her assisted living facility. My son’s family lives with us at present and there are times we are responsible for the granddaughters. Drama at work can drain my energy reducing the number of writerly things I get done at the end of the day. Individually, these are only mild hiccups, but when they all come at you like a flood it can send your writing schedule out to sea. And you find yourself struggling to catch a breath and regroup.
Once I established a way to deal with the small stuff the large chaotic surprises have a basic pattern to follow.
- A few hundred words a day is better than none.
- Go to the library or a café for a few hours to work
- Turn off your cell phone if possible
- Don’t accept a large project during a family drama
- Have someone double check your work before submitting because your focus may be skewed now.
- Ask for extensions but keep writing as if you don’t have one.
- Reach out to family and friends for help. Don’t be a super hero. Not only will your writing suffer, but also those you care about most.
Anyone care to add to this list? I’d love to hear how you cope with big and small potholes along your writing journey.
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“A few hundred words a day is better than none.” Thank you.
I’ve spent so much time writing in crisis I ended up writing a whole book about it! HOW TO WRITE WHEN EVERYTHING GOES WRONG was meant to support writers in tough times. I’d be so pleased if it can help some if you.
—Allie Pleiter
My hubby bought that book. It’s a great addition to your library.
This serves as a reminder to those of us without major turmoil in our writing lives to be thankful and get busy writing while we can. Thanks so much for sharing.
So true.
Very wise words. Thank you for the reminder that life goes on even when we want to write and only write. 🙂
I can so relate to that. But I think the trials make our writing richer.
All of your points are helpful, Cindy. One more that makes all the difference for me is to schedule time to pray and just be with God. His peace that passes understanding calms me, enabling me to cope with increased times of stress. When I do that, Holy Spirit prompts me to make writing notes in my phone (while in a waiting room) I can return to later.
Absolutely, Kathryne, very good point.